Its been a while hasn't it? As much as I love blogging I did need a little break. Life lately has just been really tough, I've been desperately searching for a new job as my current job is becoming pretty unbearable not to mention just doesn't pay enough. I've also had a ton of coursework for uni to do add into that multiple interviews, rejections and anxiety and you get me feeling pretty tired, down trodden and like life just isn't working right now. This space is supposed to be a creative outlet where I can have fun and relax but it just started to feel like another pressure I some how had to fit into my life. I didn't feel like being creative or going out to take outfit posts looking all smiley and bright when actually I was exhausted and felt like life had just smacked me round the face with a pole. It really hasn't been a great few months and I'd love to say its all solved now but it really isn't, I've had more rejections, more let downs, I am still stuck in a job that is making me really unhappy and we really do not have enough money to live on right now. We both knew that the first few years of marriage would be difficult as we are both students and therefore are unable to earn very much but it was a little unexpected to have so much going out and not a lot coming back in. Moving out of student accommodation and into a privately owned flat means you are suddenly face with bills you just can't afford on a part time wage or student loan. We know this is just a small part of our lives and that we will eventually graduate and be able to make enough money to live but its still pretty difficult when you know you've another year of this to go.
But amongst the rubbishness there have been little glimmers of joy, a day full of sunshine and smiles where we've put our troubles aside for a few hours. Yesterday was one of those days. I managed to get myself another interview and I submitted some coursework so we decided to take the afternoon off and just enjoy ourselves. We didn't want to go too far away so just made out way down to Port Meadow for a little amble along the Thames. We went the opposite way to the way we normally go and found it deserted and quiet. It was really beautiful just soaking up some sunshine and listening to the birds sing in the trees. I really am trying to enjoy these moments, to consciously stay in the the present and try not to worry about the future but it is hard. I am really looking forward to some more days like this in the summer, they may not be entirely carefree but they help us to remember not everything is hard and difficult and to remind us of all the reasons we fell in love with each other in the first place.
What I wore...
